For years I have felt clipped down.Every time I jump to fly I get cut down by my circumstances and emotions.
I have allowed them control of my life...ALL aspects of my life. As an artist this gives me a lot of substance to work with, but it also holds me back. Way back.
I prelude this post with that because I want you to understand where I'm coming from. As a wife to an amazing man (they're rare and I was blessed with one!); a mother to a baby girl who loves to make you laugh and smiles so bright; a homemaker with a solid, strong house we just can't believe is ours; a gift that I truly just adore, drawing truly is my soul; but I've been depressed, unhappy, at my ropes end over and over again, and I'm beyond tired.
I have talked about this before in past posts, it's not a secret that I keep, and I willingly share it because I know I AM NOT ALONE. Especially as a woman. We all suffer greatly with the multitude of responsibilities gifted to us. And I use the word gifted, because I now remind myself "I GET to be his wife, I GET to be her mom, I GET to do what I love for a living!". Wow, amen to that!
Back to what I'm saying...
my point is I'm done trying. I'm finished. Ta ta, bye bye, no more. It's over.
What better time to say that than the beginning of a new year! Here are some highlights of "wow" moments for me about this year:
15 years ago I graduated high school.
I am 33 this year, the same age Jesus was when he sacrificed his life for mine.
My daughter turns one January 28th.
My husband has been supporting us for 5 years.
I am at a place where I know now is the time to just stop. Stop trying to take control, stop making excuses, stop thinking so darn hard about what to do, and instead DO IT. Commit to my life.
Commit to my life.
I want to fly. I realized after years and years, the truth behind why I paint fairies, angels, and mermaids (thank you Kelly for helping me get there). It's because they are free, or at least symbolize freedom. For a mermaid there is no ground and sky, they roam all of it. For a fairy there is not ground or sky untouched, they grace all of it. Angels can transcend time and realms between earth and heaven. Freedom. Flight. I'm inspired and take a deep breath. Amazing.
I purchased the abilities to have a shop on my website, and the whole site will be changing in the next couple of months. I am so excited to see the support from you, my followers, on Etsy, but to be honest the fees are starting to wear at the income I need to bring in for our family. Plus I will be able to offer so much more on my site, including my book, coloring book, and more. I can't wait!
I also purchased my first e-book, Flying Lessons, by Kelly Rae Roberts. I must say, I'm floored by how spot on she is as a teacher and coach. She's very airy, in depth, and in tuned with her creative spirit. I had mentioned her in the past ( read Life Inspired post here ), and how she inspires me....oh buddy does she inspire me. Her words, colors, textures, and how she shares being a seeker of Joy, filled with light, hope, and possibilities. As an artist I truly believe there are those of us who are called to be artisans of light. I KNOW I am one of them. I KNOW who I want to be, deep down inside, just waiting for the permission to FLY.
Her e-book not only helps the business end of things (which she lays it all down and hides no detail from you), she goes deep into facing your fears, finding your inspiration, your passion, your quiet whispering voice just waiting to come out. And then asks you to commit to your creative business. Merging both. Being both. Living with the joy it brings. Loving YOU.
Loving me as ME.
My spiritual path has started this year with a bang of AH HA, it's so much more than the e-book. We found a new church home we are so at peace with, the new messages being given, new tools handed to me, and renewed, meaningful relationships. It's all falling together amongst chaos, and I give all of the credit to Jesus. It's scary to say that in the open because I know what is attached to that in so many ways, on so many levels, but as a former practicing witch, spiritually seeking wanderer, and a highly curious person, it is by his grace I am where I am today. I have to squint to stay focused, but I'm committed. Committed to him and my life.
There is so much more for my business, and to share. Changes are coming visually for the blog (it will most likely be moving) and website, my approach, and you may even see just a tad bit of change in how I paint. Look for it, and let me know what you think. I hope you're just as excited as I am.
Happy New Year everyone!
Good luck with it all. Can't wait to see all that comes from this journey you are taking. I find the best art is the art that grows with the artist. I love watching how the art grows and changes over the years.
Sara, your story has been inspiring me for over a year now. Your art is amazing and I admit I am jealous of your skills! But I know you have been using watercolor for many years and I am still awkwardly new at it! Anyway, I feel a kinship with you as you are searching about and trying to make those changes because I am searching about too and finding fear a door I must go through to go where I yearn to go. "I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me". Hang on to that. I am too. Can't wait to see your journey.
I found your art at the end of last year, and after reading your post, I know that i was lead here. I also recently decided that I would be making a change in how my art and honestly my world would be working. I love my art, and writing, but I also love using my imagination, and it has been being left unattended because of those same reasons you said. I've been clipping my own wings. I decided last year that I would no longer do this, and that I would put it in God's hands. He led me to your art, and I am so thankful that your kindred spirit will be on the same path as mine this year. I'll be checking out that book you mentioned as well. Thank you for posting this, your work is beautiful, and I cannot wait to continue to be inspired by it. <3
Life is our journey - and you are walking yours well, sweetpea. <3 Mummy
Yes, that's the way to think really. New year, new beginnings, love your art and I wish you well with your artistic journey to which we all journey on individually and simultaneously together in some respects.
Your excitement is contagious! Finding the right path for art, especially when trying to integrate it as a business, can be so hard...I struggle with it daily.
I'm so looking forward to seeing all of the new changes...I wish you all the best!
Sounds like we are at a similar cross road in our lives. I too have made the decision to take it up notch when it comes to my art and my business.
I don't know if you or your followers will find these helpful, but I sure did: a series of videos to help us (women in business) get off to a good start in 2015. Check out the Conquer Summit if you are interested.
I'll be following along as you share all of your progress and changes. Best of luck to you and your venture!
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Alison, Thanks for the link, I'll definitely check it out. I appreciate the share, we all need to lift each other up and help each other grow. :)
Kristin, I'm so encouraged by your words! Thank you!
Joni, when I first read your post I got goosebumps! I get so filled up when I read how God is moving, when I get to see him moving. I look forward to this journey, and I will be watching you too. Let's fly!!
Thank you everyone for your words of encouragement and support. You have helped affirm that being transparent, true to your heart, and courageous sews and reaps love.
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